Alone.
Striking solitude. The depth and breadth of absence. Being utterly alone -- the feeling piercing your soul while you're in the midst of experiencing community with humankind to remind you that no one is capable to fill the void.
The void.
My void.
A deep, dark void that takes my fullest and most treasured moments of companionship all built up like strong sandcastles on the beach and destroys them, engulfing and eroding their foundations as water seeps in to destroy what was once thought stable and strong.
A void that reminds me of my own humanity. An other-wordly void... does anyone else know what I'm talking about? Beautiful humans filled with fragility, brokeness, and (albeit imperfect) love desperately want to fill the void for those they care about. Sadly, I've found each person I've met to be utterly incapable to fill mine.
God is in my void. It's hard to explain, it's just something you experience and know deep down in a part of you. I'm not sure I even understand. I only sensed God was present in the void after I'd *deeply* felt the void.
